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      from No more cash for me

I made the mistake of using cash the other day. You remember cash… Those green bills with the faces on them and all the different sizes of silver coins, with a few copper pennies mixed in. Most of us carry cash, but when it comes time to pay – out comes the plastic.

Because plastic’s easier. No mathematical calculations; no sifting through coins, looking for one more nickel. With plastic, you don’t have to decide whether to pull out a twenty or a ten and a five and - how many ones?

Three. Well, two if you don’t mind reaching in your pocket for a bunch of coins and counting out two quarters, a dime, a nickel and four pennies. But if you don’t use your change, you’re gonna get a bunch more of those coins back and you already have too many.

So carefully you count out the change, but you’re a penny short so you reach for the little tray with all the pennies in it, but there’s no penny tray here, so now what? You put the coins back in your pocket and go for the one dollar bill.

But all you have is two fives...

from The elevator doors kept opening

I pressed the elevator button – harder this time - and waited for the doors to close, but just like last time, they didn’t. I reached down and pressed the “Close Door” button.

Hurry! Hurry! I need to get back before the speaker begins. I’d run up to my room for a jacket between dinner and dessert because the banquet room was cold as ice. Well, I didn’t run actually. I scurried to the elevator, punched the button and rode slowly, smoothly up to the twelfth floor. No problem. Elevator worked perfectly. Slow, but perfect.

In my room I couldn’t find my jacket anywhere. I dumped practically everything out of my suitcase and still no jacket. I figured I must’ve left it in the car, so I rushed back to the elevator and now I was going to be late and this darn elevator absolutely wouldn’t go anywhere.

“Ping!” the elevator doors opened. I started to get out, but we hadn’t gone anywhere...